I see it as a piece of myself, as a human being.
You can even put it together as a part of me being a woman.
But as fragile and sensitive as that is.
It is not something that is locked or as the advertisements mention it as something to be unlocking.
Because it is not a lack, but an abundance that is residing in me.
I wasn’t even offended that he said that.
It felt more like a compliment.
I was watching ‘The Crown’.
There were new episodes and it was being promoted on social media for people to watch.
I am not going to name the broadcaster of that show, as I think we all know who that is.
I had ended or paused my account for some time.
I wasn’t watching anything at that moment and to me the options there were then, were too limited.
A cut in my expenses.
Not necessary, but just that it wasn’t worth paying for.
For the simple fact, I wasn’t watching anything.
Why pay for something I am not using?
I can’t really call this person a celebrity.
However he has a lot of followers on Social Media.
A journey he started, according to himself.
Just telling here his own words.
‘That intense journey started when I posted a lot about my life’.
I don’t really know how it went further.
He didn’t really say so much about it.
But it weren’t these words that made me notice him.
It was a post that he got married.
I was going through my own pictures on my phone and saw some video’s I once made.
One was when I was celebrating my 37th birthday.
A little game I played, with people I once knew.
It was actually a drinking game, where questions were asked and then we had to drink at some point.
I don’t really know how it was played, since we decided to just answer the questions.
We had to laugh a lot about it. About the answers.
But it wasn’t much about the questions, answers or the celebration of my birthday.
It was about something that I heard, when watching another video.
There are some stories that I am reading.
About women, where they find a partner, that is already in a relationship with another woman.
I am always amazed, because I always read that every single woman in these stories are telling that ‘they shouldn’t be doing that’.
However they continue, because there are stories outthere where the man chooses to be with ‘the other woman’. And this is something they are holding on to.
It must have been a long time since I went out.
However when I think about it, that is not completely true.
It was maybe a long time ago since I had this similar feeling, that I had, when going out like the way I did.
But at the moment I was having this epiphany, perhaps even the experience, it didn’t feel like it was that long ago, however it wasn’t yesterday also.
The first time I was in Lisbon, I went to places to see what the city was like.
I was amazed, better to say surprised about the openness of sexuality.
Not to say that there was a lot of sex in the streets, but for example gay people walking hand in hand. Openly.
Just a lot of gay people being there. Generally.
Not that they were open about their sexuality.
And not so many people being bothered about it.
I don’t want to say any names, mainly because I do not want to be associated with that person.
Also a calling of a name, says that this person exist.
Of course it is up for debate that I am speaking about it now like this.
But what has to die, eventually will.
Even speaking about it in the highest light.