When it comes to relationships there is something to it.
At least what I believe.
So much out there and yet nobody really knows how it starts or what is bound to it.
My last story is about whether or not a love relationship is important.
Perhaps a bit uncommon to question.
I think this is where it starts, the base of it.
If we don’t understand at all a love relationship is important, why should we start having a relationship in the first place?
It is not so much the importance making me think, it needs to have some sort of meaning.
Which is for me what this word importance means in the sentence.
What is the meaning of a love relationship?
I mean, not all words have the meaning of what it says.
This is just an example.
Perhaps another way to explain the word importance in this context is it has to have some kind of framework.
The meaning of where it can start from and understand for the mind what it can expect.
I believe a relationship starts with the expectation of what to expect.
That framework where we can do the things meant for it.
We can even call it a love expectation.
Or how I would name it.
As I explained in my story :
‘What is the start of a relationship?’
Where in Japanese dating culture Japanese people start a relationship to go on a first date.
And yes, there is much to say about it, whether or not this is the way to go.
However, in a way it makes sense.
At least how I explained it.
It is a framework for people to come together and do what is expected.
For the mind and heart to get some rest, perhaps even some kind of relief to be able to do those things with that expectation.
Of course it is up for debate if that is the right order.
But today I will not go there.
Just something I am thinking about and I believe is normal to consider.
For the sake of how to start a relationship.
Because we can have a relationship, or call it this way to make it understandable.
Perhaps just for the story or for our mind to believe this is what we are having.
I understand there is a lot unknown and uncertain about it.
However, when I go a bit deeper here.
I believe the most important relationship is the one we have with our mother.
Which is for me no wonder.
It is a source to keep on going, to feel safe and know everything will be alright.
An importance coming from the inside, from the outside it means you are worthwhile.
To some extent a solid and stable person.
Which is all welcome to me.
My mother passed away some time ago.
We were only shortly together in life, until we got separated from each other.
There is much to say about how and what.
Perhaps some feelings I should express.
We can reminisce and cry those tears.
I mean, I do miss her still till this day.
Which is all normal considering the circumstance.
However, I am still bound to her, in my genes as an example.
The way I look, perhaps even how I hold my fork.
There is really no escaping, is what I am saying.
It means there is nothing I can make it go away, just to realize and write it down, the way I am doing.
To keep this as a mental note, if one day I forget.
I will always remain her daughter.
For me to know the relationship with me and her continues, although she passed on.
It is something I am retrieving, perhaps getting back in a way.
Although I do understand I am not getting her back into the physical.
Just a reality I am living in, sane and healthy.
It is the words which make them complete and understand, to realize certain things can happen to us.
However, the relationship remains, in any kind of way.
One we need to learn, or even overcome.
To understand it brings us closer to ourselves.
Where we feel home, warm and accepted for who we are.
Even if we don’t even know ourselves what that actually is.
To me, this is what the relationship with our mother means.
Even when they died in any kind of way or can’t be with us for some other reason.
We still have that relationship with her.
It can be a tough cookie to swallow or a cheering up, which explains how deep that feeling is.
And yes, I condemned her for the things she didn’t do.
I mean a relationship doesn’t mean I am taking everything for granted.
Even if she already passed on, to say I have this relationship with her on earth.
It is where I rest my case and wipe away those tears.
Which is all I have with her and there is nothing I can change about.
Because when you think about it, this is what the relations with our mother means.
A source to live from, to feel good about ourselves.
To know we will make it one day relying on the fact we can bounce back and overcome those hurdles of life.
Which are sometimes a pain in the ass.