Many times I have thought Love starts when there is Trust.
‘If I can trust you blindly, I can love you blindly’.
And it didn’t come out of nowhere that I had these thoughts about trust and love.
And connecting them together.
When coming from a relationship of lies, my first questions were raised about this.
Not even stating what the effect of the lies had done to me.
Just the questions.
Perhaps even a way for me to search for ground to experience love.
Not even talking about true or genuine love. Real love.
Just love in its essence.
But are trust and love connected?
Do we need trust to be able to love?
Better to say does love start with trust?
And if not where does love start?
When typing this, my mind is going back to a moment, where I had asked something.
Something for my sanity and wellbeing.
I had asked. ‘Can you turn off the music?’
‘I am sleeping and I need to wake up tomorrow in the morning’.
I remember I even went out of bed for this.
Not only that.
I had asked it twice and also went out of bed for it twice.
Cause love, means also loving yourself.
That sometimes means you need to say something and get out of bed for it.
Twice.
By saying that.
As beautiful self love can be, speaking up and protecting your own sanity and wellbeing.
I believe when it comes to love, we need to have our needs met.
It means that if I express my love for myself, in this context of saying to turn something off, that I need to sleep and want to sleep.
It should be met (at all times and under any circumstance).
In general, needs should be met.
Meeting these specific needs, brings safety and in essence trust.
If it is a stone to build further on and say we need this to love?
I can’t say.
However it is a good start. As we feel safe when our needs are met.
And with safety comes trust.
Does love start with safety and trust?
I actually don’t think so.
Not in this context at least.
But it gives a feeling we matter and that we exist and that in itself is already a form of love.
Without existence and the feeling we matter, we are not able to love and be loved.