‘Venting is healthy and you should never refrain from it Lakshmi’.
The words gave me clear directions.
Not just only for me to understand.
So I am sharing those words that were said to me, directly.
It was after a brave moment I had.
This is what I had said.
‘I am sorry, but I really need to complain’.
I followed with some more lines and also said :
‘It is giving me a headache’.
Finally I concluded with : ‘So.. that was it’.
It wasn’t a word vomit or something I needed to speak up about.
It was really something that was bothering me and that had made me sick.
Not the complaint, that had made me sick.
The complaint was just the way to release and to admit.
That this was boiling underneath the surface with me.
Not the tip of the iceberg.
I felt so sick while typing those words in that conversation.
It was a chat actually.
To show my vulnerability.
To show that it was bothering me.
That I am a human being.
The headache came up, the nausea started to leave.
There was no place for them anymore.
The chat conversation continued.
I was reading what other people were bothered with.
Not to say I was the one to make that first move.
‘Being in the same boat is a way of binding’.
Is what I said.
We were still talking in that chat.
‘Thank you for letting me know, I will write about this’.
And that is where I left.