I was wondering if boys think the same as girls.
If they think further when they meet someone.
I am not speaking about what they think about getting married, or fantasizing about their outfit at the altar.
But perhaps it is more innocent, or less far fetched.
I don’t know how to explain otherwise, for the simple fact that I am just asking this.
If boys also do that.
Although I write about love and wonder many times if people understand what it is I am writing.
Perhaps an insecurity I am facing or just thinking if my stories are ever going to be read and spread.
We talk so much about love, thinking we know what that means.
How it is and how that feels.
But if we truly know what love is, shouldn’t we be talking less?
If there are no doubts and mysteries, then why is this something we want to reach?
I just don’t believe a lot of people are together with each other from that perspective.
That is just the things I see, If I look around.
And also my parents as an example.
They were arranged married, with perhaps economical or other reasons for them to be together.
I can’t ask them, they passed away already for some time.
It is that I am on this love journey, but what love truly means, nobody knows.
That is at least what I am thinking.
I was on my way home, sitting in the tram, after I had done yoga, that I had this epiphany.
It was that I was thinking about an encounter I had.
‘Is he thinking about me, the same as I am doing?’
And this is where I have to leave it.
Because, it doesn’t matter what I was trying to ask with this.
It is just not a question for me to answer.
Since that are not my thoughts I am having.
And I don’t think I should have them in the first place.
Because I think love is also about keeping the focus.
So to answer that question.
I think we all have thoughts.
Sometimes we think about others and sometimes we don’t.
Sometimes I think someone is stupid and think to myself.
‘Why is that person doing that?’
I think : ‘That is wrong to do it’.
And : ‘There should be a better way to act’.
Or I would think.
‘What was this person thinking?
Not so much sarcastic.
I mean it a bit negative.
But with all these thoughts and thinking.
We keep ourselves occupied, perhaps even protected from any harm.
But I also think we lose some kind of focus.
Because when we think about other people.
We think about them.
A form to keep someone alive.
And I mean that in the sense that if we think negative things about any person.
Thoughts are thoughts.
They don’t distinguish, right from wrong.
People do that.
But with the act of thinking about others in a negative way.
We are losing a part of ourselves.
Giving our power to that other person, by the simple act of that one thought.
Although they would never know and perhaps not even feel it.
It is the sense to ourselves that can fill us up and cause sickness to our health.
I guess this is something unknown.
Just something I am feeling.
But I understand it can be difficult to stop thinking about someone.
Even if that is in a positive light.
And I mean that, when we think about whether that other person has the same thoughts, as we are having.
Again this is a loss of power to what is truly important.
The focus to ourselves.
It can be changed quickly to do something we love.
A walk in the park, some fresh air or the beaming sunlight as a reflection to our face.
Or just a look in the mirror, taking a shower.
I believe the real question is : Why do we want to know if someone thinks about us, the same as we think about them?
Perhaps it is because we feel lonely inside and if we know that someone thinks the same, it could be a solution to that loneliness.
I believe it is an answer that I can confirm.
Not so much that this other person thinks the same or even has these same thoughts.
In the past or in the future.
But when people are around.
They think about each other.
In any form of way.
A form to keep us alive.
What is most important is that we can also have thoughts about ourselves.
Did you ever think about that?
How we think about our hair, our body, our feelings or more simple things.
What we think about how we look.
It is again a change in focus, where we shed a light to ourselves instead creating a space for thoughts to be leaked, that perhaps are not even our own.
And I believe this is where the real magic happens.
A turn around in events and other people will start to think about, well …
You can fill that in for yourself.
It is where we feel less lonely and with a lighter heart.
Because a heavy heart is hard to love.