It is not something that is coming of age, or perhaps it is exactly just that.
When it comes to love.
Age is really a thing.
At least it has always been for me.
I was young mature.
Not sure what was the reason for that. I just was.
16 years, looking like 24.
25 years, looking like 32.
However when passing the 30 it seemed I was going in reverse.
I remember going out when I was 35 and had to say ‘no’ to giving my number to a guy that was just 19 years.
He asked me : ‘Why can’t I have your number?’
The disappointment I could hear in his voice.
Like, he was saying. ‘Don’t kill my vibe’.
I understand, at that age, it is more a hunting game.
It brought me back to when I was that age and was somehow involved.
With a man that was my age now, I believe he was 36 then.
Of course I couldn’t tell this young fella that I could almost be his mom.
By not giving my number, I certainly didn’t kill any vibe, but made sure that his mind and spirit would stay alive.
And also to make sure that there really is no chance and I am better off with a man of maturer age.
Because someone at the beginning of their twenties is not fully grown yet, to completely understand.
At least that is my opinion.
It was also the realization that perhaps it is different for men and women in their mid thirties.
Because the guy of 36, I once was casually with, I know now, I wasn’t ready to do any of that.
Not even to protect myself, to prevent it from happening.
I was only ready to be just fooling around, just a little bit.
That seems to me more proper for that age.
I was still so innocent.
However I am grateful for that experience.
Coming into this age and being now in my mid thirties, it is something that I can now fully grasp and therefore let go.
However, why did the guy of 36 do this?
It is still something I can’t put my finger at.
It is a burden off my shoulder, to understand I did something different in the situation that was the same.
That I know better ways to raise my vibration than going into someone’s pool of youthness.
With saying this, it seems nothing is lost and all is flowing back to me.
But my age is still a bit of a thing.
‘I can’t believe you are 38’. Is still what I hear.
There is nothing that I can change about that, really.
But I believe when it comes to love, there is no label attached.
As much as I think about it.
There is really nothing I can think of to explain about the age of love.
What I do think.
The only explanation I can give to myself is that love is not connected to age.
However, for some things we are really too young or too old to be doing.
When it comes to the man that I think, for me, is a great match, is someone that can understand that.
Perhaps, it could even be the greatest love of all.