I was looking at him.
He wasn´t doing something particular.
I believe he was just sitting behind his laptop, a cup of coffee next to him.
I was still looking and it almost felt like I was staring.
He was still sitting there silently and me watching him, not doing anything.
I took my coffee as an anchor, perhaps even to gain some security.
The passing of thoughts and feelings kept me occupied.
Where we were both sitting in the same room.
The silence between us, always had been comforting.
There was no doubt, that we could just be.
But there was always still this feeling that kept me busy, in this silent portrait.
Where we both would drink our coffee, next to each other quitely.
It was something I was thinking about for some time, already.
What is it going to be with him?
What is the future with me and him?
I wasn’t thinking about it too deep, more just where was this was going.
Whatever it was between us.
It was first time I could be in someone’s presence, feeling the way I was feeling, without saying a word.
Still, I didn’t know if that was going to be enough to have a love that could live.
Perhaps, it was in that moment, that I had this epiphany it started to become a love that was dying.
Because if it was enough, I wouldn’t be questioning it.