A story I once wrote.
About something I once heard.
It was said that the older you get, it is more difficult to be able to find love.
In that story I once wrote with the title :
‘Love is love, no matter what age’.
I argue that a little bit.
Perhaps just giving my opinion.
At least that I think differently from what is known about that or what we have come to believe that age can become more difficult when we are older.
More about it in that story, where I shine my light from a female perspective and even from the point of being single in my late thirties.
However, I started to think about this topic again.
About age and the difficulty of finding love later in life.
A TV-show I was watching.
With the main topic about finding love.
How appropiate.
Single people with a Bed & Breakfast, looking for that special one.
A selection made at first by the B&B owners.
Where the chosen few were passing by without a given notice.
To see if there was something that would hold ground.
If it is love, that remains the question.
At first I was hesitant to watch this kind of show.
Directed, perhaps even scripted for spectators to watch.
Not to make it a conspiracy.
I was just questioning if it was leaving room for love to happen.
The irony, since these people are running a B&B.
I think it is funny.
Haha.
However, to me it made sense.
Since we don’t know when love happens.
If at all such a thing exists.
So, I decided to just watch.
With everything I was thinking and feeling about it.
Time passed.
A few weeks forward.
The show has something.
I can understand why.
It has its edges and perhaps even something real.
I have to say, I was moved by the characters a few times.
‘This is such a loser!’
‘He is really ugly!’
‘What is this person thinking!’
‘I can’t believe she does that!’.
‘He doesn’t know what to decide, that is making him not a relationship type!’.
And that were some of the things I said.
I hope you get the picture.
Because the show isn’t over yet.
I don’t know if that is a relief.
But it is exciting, somehow.
To be moved in this kind of way.
This is where the magic happened for me.
One of the B&B owners fell in love.
He was an older man, she was also mature.
Don’t ask me how I know.
You could just see that.
They were drinking wine, thinking about the road ahead.
What it was holding for them.
Concluded, perhaps even agreed they had feelings for each other.
Then kissed it away.
Cute it was.
To some extent.
And then something happened.
The owner started to express doubts.
To himself first.
Then it grew to something that was too much.
He went to the woman and told her that it wasn’t going to work with her.
I will leave her reaction outside this story.
But she needed a minute.
Let me say it like this.
This is where I am in this episode with them.
As much as I would like to tell you more.
There just isn’t much more to say.
Still waiting for the episode to come.
But it was something that made me realize.
As mentioned before in that story I once wrote.
I don’t think that it is more difficult when we are older to find love.
However, the side note I want to make.
The older we get, the more experienced we are getting.
The more experiences we are having.
The good and ugly ones.
The ones we like to forget and perhaps hold some shame around.
But the truth is, with experience comes a package.
Something we can call age even.
Perhaps that is the reason why.
Why we are not able to find love at an older age.
It is more a statement than a question.
If you would ask me.
But with these experiences, we can build up fear.
Since we experienced things we rather want to forget.
It can lead to a fear of commitment.
Where I believe this B&B owner started to have doubts.
Even said that it wasn’t going to work anymore.
Can you believe that?
We can build that wall around our heart.
Create a space where we are comfortable with ourselves.
However it can be a mask of loneliness.
Only by releasing these old residues.
Experiences that have come with time, perhaps even with age.
However, whether it is truly connected with age, remains a question for me.
What I try to say.
To conclude my thinking.
I still don’t think age is a block to love.
However, when we are over time not able to process those love experiences that have marked our heart.
When we don’t shed those tears, empty that overflowing cup of heartbreak.
That is the true block of love.