My heart is going faster, without understanding why.
There is an attraction going on, someone I think I like.
I also know we could never be together.
It doesn’t involve another person, the reason why it could never be.
It has to do with our backgrounds, what he is like, who I am from the inside.
That might be still a mystery, although it isn’t for me.
There is a hunger for this person. The reason why I am feeling this way.
The thoughts in the back of my head are constantly showing it to me.
I am feeling calm, and I know what to do.
However we could never be, in the end.
There is a lot before it will come to that, I know.
However for some reason I am seeing it that way.
I am fancy, he is quite rough.
I am delicate and keen, something he isn’t.
The words I speak are considerate, he just speaks the way his mind is telling him.
He wouldn’t fit my standards, in whatever way.
And so I am longing for him.
He thinks about me, at least sexually.
I don’t know if it would be dangerous.
However it is this time, before we could ever meet in any way, that I have to be kind.
Seeing all options, considering my feelings and preparing for it.
I know.
What has to live will, the epiphany I am living.
It shows the deeper meaning of a love considering me.