With my last love encounter still on my mind, I don’t know if it is something I reminisce.
It feels there is something odd. The way it all changed, after we had sex.
Not after that moment, we even went for a coffee where everything was just fine.
We kissed goodbye and made a deal to meet again. It felt good and we wanted more.
The words we both said, where we kissed it away.
Nothing seemed to be at stake and then it went down, somehow.
I believe we both went our separate ways on how we are approaching a relationship.
Nothing that seemed to be the same anymore.
Strange, is all I can say.
I never knew sex could do such a thing.
However, I never doubted it was something to think about.
Anyway, there is more to it.
I still just don’t understand what changed.
There is no logic behind it, but that is not the end.
Where it is constantly comes down to.
I am not going up and down in my mind, stable I feel from the inside.
Where I feel rested and I am at ease.
Then something shows up again.
A conversation that is reminding me, the feelings I am feeling.
My head starts aching, where I can’t tell if it is from the thoughts about him.
The sickness it is giving me, where I feel I am leveling up.
I have never experienced something so complex.
It has so many angles, where I am being pulled into deep.
Showing me the deeper meaning of myself, although I have to keep that a secret for now.
However, the meeting with this lover brought me further on that path.
Where I was able to overcome this heartache. Because in the end it was painful.
That fog is clearing up.
The more I write, the more it starts making sense.
The epiphanies I am getting, because there was so much to it.
Where I can only say, the door is closed by the things that happened.
It feels good to not wait for some magic to happen and continue the road for my next destination.
Something I am opening up for slowly.
Where all I can say, it will be something casual.