Today I was talking about what kind of person we fall for.
I was eating breakfast, perhaps even early lunch.
We were just sitting at the dining table.
‘What is your type?’ I asked the person sitting right to me.
‘Do you like girls?’
I didn’t say anything further.
There was a little bit of time between the first and second question.
I don’t know if it was a hesitation, but it was just enough for me to ask that other question.
A filling of space in the time provided.
I believe it was the right question to ask, before asking what the type he was falling for.
I think that was the reason there was time in between the answers, because he couldn’t start there.
It was necessary to understand first which category we were looking at.
Then he said he thinks they can be beautiful.
A confirmation he was falling for guys.
‘I think girls are not ugly’, was my response.
He wasn’t asking me, it was just something that slipped through my mouth.
An expression that wanted to come out, I guess.
While I was saying this, I was perplexed by my own words.
It sounded quite negative, however that was not my intention.
Talking can be a bit hard sometimes.
Just being compassionate here about the situation I created somehow.
I was able to explain what I meant.
Shortly after I ended my sentence I said : ‘I am not attracted to girls, so this is what I was saying it like that’.
The silence in the room disappeared and we talked a bit more about the person we are falling for.
At least what we are thinking in that moment of time.
I mean, all can change and how it is we feel about that.
And while we were telling each other what kind of men we were thinking of, that we could fall for.
I was thinking about a story I once wrote with the same kind of subject.
Perhaps just something I needed to write down.
I was wondering why I was having sort of the same kind of conversation from the first time I heard this kind of question.
We can have the same kind of conversation to see where you we are at a different time and space.
But the expression of all of that is a clearance of the heart.
To be clear, we are still looking for love.
Still on the go, to find that something special.
What we are hoping and dreaming of with all of our heart.
Which is healthy in its essence.
At least something I believe in.
And that is where I am leaving it for today.